Happy weekend and Happy Father's Day!

Moments after loosing our son my husband and I embraced. In a rare moment of strength I  assured him everything was going to be okay, that we were going to be okay. Admittedly, deep down I was worried, we were entering the unknown. The only thing I knew for sure was of our love and that it could withstand the greatest heartache. I remember seeing the pain in his eyes and how I wanted to make it all go away.  In the coming weeks and months our roles reversed. Often I would burst into tears and repeatedly say "All I want is our son back. I miss him so much it hurts." He would loving say, "I know, so do I" and he would hold me all the tighter. 

Fatherhood has been a journey for my husband and he has born it with love, grace and kindness. He has never been angry or asked why, instead he has always been grateful. Grateful for our son, grateful to be a father. When I think of my husband I think of goodness. My husband is a good and kind man, the kind of guy who would give anything for his family. The very qualities I was eager to help instill in my son. The world needs more good men I would think to myself. I was happy we were going to be able to contribute a good man to society. 

As Father's Day approaches I am grateful for another child growing inside of me. If they are anything like their father or brother, then they are going to be one fantastic little being. For us being parents looks different than I imagined, but I am slowly starting to learn being different is exactly how we were meant to be.